Monday, October 09, 2006

 
Thank you!!!! The Wench sent me the most amazing gift from South Africa a treasure that I added to my key ring to keep with me!!! Thanks doll - you are the best!!

 
The most common question I get asked is my impressions of South Africa, it's a hard question to answer honestly without offending people and it is not something I can be objective about. You see South Africa for me was not just a place, it was the very essence of who I was and how I defined myself. It was a magical place that gave me the values and ideals that I live my life by. The essence of South Africa is more then the breathtaking beauty, of which there is so much, but more of the intrinsic values of the people who inhabit her. Those who go out of their way to be kind to strangers, to help each other. To get off their arse and be nice just because they can. To open their homes and hearts to people that they barely know and may never see again. There is so much good and special within the borders.

I felt trapped while I was there, not just by the burden of travelling with two small kids but by exposing them to the inherit dangers, the crime, the rapes, the muggings, the murders. Thankfully we were spared any of those ghastly experiences and my kids did not see that side which was plastered over the television and newspapers. Corruption is rife. The jewel of Africa is being stripped down and I felt helpless as I watched her slowly being raped. People are starving, they desperately line the streets begging for food. Everywhere I turned someone wanted something from me where it was money or food or to hock me their wares, it was always something.

Growing up in South Africa I was always amazed by the strength and dignity of the black population, stripped of so many of their rights under apartheid they still carried themselves with a grace and dignity that I have never seen replicated anywhere else in the world. The people made me sad, so very sad, living on Long Island in NY I am isolated from crime and poverty and I rarely encounter people who are in financial trouble unless they are unable to make their BMW payment, not the desperation of every morsel of food counting, I live far from that.

I don't look over my shoulder, we have no bars on our windows and the front door is not always locked. We certainly lock up at night and if I am home alone the alarm goes on, but I can drive at night by myself without the knot in my stomach, without the fear and I know that I live a safe life provided I am not careless or stupid. My kids can walk to school and ride their bikes outside, I meet friends for dinner or coffee without a worry.

There was a lot to get used to in South Africa, besides the places I knew no longer being there, besides the food being so unbelievably rich my kids got sick. It was weird having doorhandles be higher and toilets are higher too. Its weird driving a manual car on the "wrong" side of the street. Its weird having people at every intersection selling goodies.

I am awed by the talent of the craftsmen, there is such a glut of artists selling their beaded wire crafts, breathtaking and I was saddened by how the housekeepers are worked for so long and so hard. Old ladies working late into the night cleaning up so we could sit and relax. Women who should be retiring but instead have to work and they do so with a smile. I met so many ousies who made me sad, my white guilt kicked in big time. Its a burden I don't carry anymore.

It was so hard going to try foods that I had salivated for, for so long and the memory out weighed the reality. The one thing that could not be touched was the human connection and the laughter with friends. The real talks and the igniting of our souls as we discussed memories and events often ones we are unable to share with others. I was sadned by how few are left. So few people. Places. Things. Its not my Africa anymore. Maybe it never was.

 
Sunday, July 16th
Left the Vaal early to go meet Broom Girl, Super Mom and Wenchy. There is something so special about connecting with people on-line and then when you meet it is even better in person. I felt instantly comfortable with them and knew if I did live closer that they would be part of my crew. Jax lives in a beautiful home and laid on quite a spread, I ate so much sugar I think I was bouncing around. They also surprised me with the most thoughtful gift and I was really touched and I will treasure it. Thanks guys.

Afterwards we left to go visit my cousins who as we were getting to Rosebank, called to say one of the kids were sick and could we do it another day. No problem we hit Rosebank Flea Market instead and Ry had a "lekker stuk vleis" at the Black Steer, the first proper meal she had eaten since our night at Jody.

Back to the Vaal to pack for our trip to Sun City.

Monday July 16th
8am took the car in to have the shocks checked - all working ok. Went to run a few errands with zonk, the clutch just gives way and I can't drive the car anymore. We waited over 2 hours for a mechanic to come from BMW to take a look at it. Turns out the clutch cylinder had gone and I had lost a lot of brake fluid - yay no clutch, no brake. Would have been a great trip to Sun City.

I had called at 8:45am and did not get into BMW before 11:30am, at which point they tell me that I missed the 10am order time to get a parts delivery. After waiting for 2 hours I flipped out - because had they come earlier we could have made it without a problem. Its amazing when you just stand your ground and push back hard how solutions are found. I really have been living in NY for too long. Magically they found a part and in less then an hour it was fitted and we were on our merry way to Sun City.

Nin and I were saying how fortunate we were and how we both consider ourselves to be lucky people. We felt so lucky that we did not get caught en-route to S.C. there are some scary roads we would have to travel on.

We arrived in Sun City, our accomdation was absolutely supurb. Too tired to hit the Spar to buy food we went to Squires Loft for what would turn out to be one of oiur favourite meals in South Africa, I had the best calamari and the steaks were supurb!!!

Tuesday, July 18th
After the stress and the trip my neck and shoulders were in such spasms I could barely move. I booked myself in for a massage of note - it was wicked and got me moving. Ah do I love to be pampered, I must have been royalty in a past life.

Nin and Happiness took the girls to the Valley of the Waves where they had an unbelievable time. After the Spa I went to Spar :), came home, whipped up dinner. Nin and I played scrabble that night, she whipped me silly.

Wednesday, July 19th
Took the kids, Nin and Happiness to the infamous Sun City Breakfast. The kids were in their element, they could not believe that I would let them eat so much crap, waffles, pancakes, sugared cereal. I let them eat to their hearts content, at R110.00 per person (around $16). I must say I don't think they made any money on us as Ry demolished their smoked salmon platter, major bucks in SA and inexpensive here, my kids eat it all the time. The kids are enjoying eating stuff that I don't keep in my house in NY. Part of the experience in SA is the culinary one, I gave my kids freedom to try anything and everything. Its a wonder they could even sit still with all the sugar swimming through their veins. Nin completely spoiled her nieces with ice creams and candy.

The kids and Happiness hit the water slides at the Valley of the waves while Nin and I read on the beach. Its been such a treat being able to read and I just devoured books, one after the other.

Thursday, July 20th
Nin went to a meeting in Pretoria. The kids sat around watching TV in their PJ's. After lunch we hit the Valley of the Waves, Ry and Happiness did the big slides while Nikki and I hung out in the kiddies section. It started getting a bit Nippy so I dropped them off at the heated pool by our room, and I spent the afternoon eating a huge bag of flings (my favourite chips) and watching TV. After dinner I taught the girls how to drink milk through a peppermint crisp - they loved it, ahhh the skills that will carry them through life :)

Friday, July 21st
Took the long drive back to the Vaal, took a wrong turn and ended up getting a tad lost but we eventually made it.

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